I found this great blog, called Hyperbole and a Half. The whole thing is hysterical, but the author, Allie, is especially funny when talking about her dogs. Especially the “simple dog”, whom she fears may be, well, mentally challenged.
I have always thought our pup Ruby the Moose Dog is smart and large and therein lies my trouble with her. She needs entertainment, perhaps a job. But after reading about “simple dog,” I’m not sure. They way they both look at their respective owners, confused about what the words coming out of our mouths mean, offering every trick they know to see if that’s what we meant.
Her dog was suddenly afraid of a statue of a horse; my dog is afraid of random items — a bag in the front yard; a garbage receptacle at the park; a lawn mower and some strollers; men in hats. Walking the neighborhood with her must sound hysterical to someone who isn’t me. A girl walking a dog randomly saying, “It’s a bike. It’s a truck. It’s okay, it’s just a garbage can.” The guy with the riding mower the other day looked at me as if I was telling him that it was a lawn mower, not the dog. He looked like he swallowed the “duh” he wanted to shout at me.
Trainer Ali — who turned me on to Hyperbole and a Half — doesn’t think Ruby is dumb, but I’m not sure any more. She thinks Ruby is just skittish. She says there is doggy research that shows mama dogs who are stressed during pregnancy often give birth to skittish pups. We don’t know about Ruby until she was 4 months old, when she entered a shelter and was fostered. She’s never been neglected or abused, but she’s a nervous nellie. The research might explain that.
What it doesn’t tell me is why no matter the tone of our voice, or how we turn our backs or walk away, she is always the happy girl whose only urge seems to be playing The Game, which I described here. She understands nothing but the rules for The Game which she has made up and may alter at will and which we need to play. Now. Also, later. If possible, yesterday, too.
If there is only one word, about one game, does that make her dumb? Only, I suppose, if we refuse to play. Given how often she gets her way, it’s possible she’s the smart one in the family.
